7 Memorable In-flight Travel Experiences

It is impossible to concretely give a percentage on how many people have traveled at least once or have never traveled. However, it is far easy to say that travelers mannerism and behavior in-flight varies on multiple things like:

1. What country does the traveler belong to?
2. How educated he or she is? Should I say, this is subjective, hmmm?
3. How socially conscientious he or she is?
4. Age is a factor.
5. Etiquettes. Have it or don’t.

Keeping in view with the above, here are some of my worst and strange in-flight experiences. Maybe one of them will resonate with you and it might have you nod your head and say, “Yah! That happened to me!” Another one might have you say to yourself, “No way, this could not be true!” While another story might have you think, “Hmm! Yes, this could have happened.”

A..hole passenger.

You know the one I am talking about. These morons exist in large numbers when one is, unfortunately traveling in economy class. They are the type you dread the most. You start praying, from the time you get ready to board, to the time the aircraft takes off.

Please God, let the person who sits behind me, be a decent man. If it’s a child, then please don’t let him, her, or the child’s parents be one of many Lucifer’s offsprings.

Also when I say a man, I am honestly not being discriminating. For instance, if the man sitting behind me has impeccable manners, then I would have nothing to complain about. However, not all men possess etiquettes. Unfortunately, these incidents take place when there is either a naughty child or an ill-manned man on board.

Furthermore, if God is on your side and listens then he will do two things for you. First, he will have no one sitting behind you. Second, he will give you the entire row to yourself, so you can jump around like a monkey for your comfort, from one seat to another. It so happened that this time the Almighty was kind of busy with other important matters.

This kind of episode has happened a few times with me on a Thai Airways flight, traveling from Bangkok to Karachi. Being in the travel business I have the privilege to monitor the seat map on Amadeus, our reservation system to see how full or empty the aircraft is, and plan my seating accordingly. Like I said, sometimes I am lucky and at other times, a journey of five hours becomes a nightmare.

My nightmare started when I reclined my seat. Seconds after I had reclined my seat, the person behind me pushed my seat with not only his hands but also his knees.  

For a few seconds, I tolerated his behavior, but I soon realized that he was the evil one I had dreaded all along, so I turned around and told him, to stop hitting my seat. I wish I could have slapped him instead of speaking to him. To my amazement, the A..hole told me to put my seat straight as he didn’t have enough leg space. I couldn’t believe it. The man had the audacity to speak to me in an ordering tone when his own seat was reclined to the maximum.

I was already livid so upon hearing his ridiculous remark, I decided to use a stern and loud voice. I am certain that half of the aircraft heard when I said, “This is economy class and space is limited, so have some manners and stop kicking my seat.” He just stared at me, while some of the other passengers gave him a look, which said, “You deserved it.” Anyhow after that, the pushing stopped to some extent, but the bottom line remains, A..hole will always be an A..hole!

Did you know that some animals snore?

Yes, there are about 15 adorable animals that snore, but when a human being snores it is not music to the ears.

Actually while writing this point I have thought of a suggestion for the airlines. They should implement a seating rule for all these snoring travelers.

At the time of reservation, airlines should ask the passenger, if he is a snorer or not. The information should then be inserted into the traveler’s reservation. This remark would allow the passenger to only select a seat in a designated ‘snorers block’ in the aircraft. Again not being discriminating, just requesting silence and peace during the time that I am in the clouds. Don’t tell me that, you are not giving a thumb’s up on my ingenious idea.

Furthermore, if a passenger has given false information regarding his disturbing habit then, an immediate monetary penalty on board would become mandatory for him to pay.

On one of my recent voyage from Bangkok to Kuala Lumpur, Mr. Snorer was seated right across the aisle from me with his wife and three children. From the time the aircraft was in the air to the time we landed, this man snorted in his sleep and snored like a bear. It was as if, he had only taken this flight to sleep and snore. I was so tempted to take my extra pair of socks and just stuff it in his mouth, but it was unfortunately only in my imagination that I could do that. The other thought that ran through my mind as I glared at him in his slumber was, “How does your wife take it, HOW?” Maybe, she has earplugs to block out his snoring. Anyhow, I had learned my lesson and now I carry earplugs on all my journeys.

Alcohol consumption.

Wisely said by James Thurber, “One martini is alright, two is too many, three is not enough.” When is it enough? I will never know.

This horrible in-flight experience took place when I was in my thirties. Am I implying that now I am an ancient soul? Stop reading too much between the words. *Smile*. Let’s start with the story. I use to travel often in the Far-East and quite a lot on Thai Airways. Encounter with the drunken fellow happened while traveling from Kuala Lumpur to Karachi. The flight was hardly ten percent occupied, so I took the liberty of moving to a center row, with all four seats to myself. What a treat!

Some of you might relate to this when I say that, I prefer my solitary mode of travel. Therefore, when the “ting, ting, ting.” started, I knew I was in the wrong aircraft. As soon as the plane was airborne the male passengers thought that the bar had opened and it was time to order alcohol for free.

Hat’s off to the airline crew who tolerate these types of passengers. The crew was busy getting meal trolleys ready, so these men were informed that they would have to wait for a while as drinks will be served with their meal. 

Little did these innocent crew members realized that some passengers were already a few drinks down, and the extra that they were getting was a drink too many for them. Alas, we had few drunkards now on board.

There was one such fellow who probably thought that every woman he laid his eyes on, would fall at his feet. I wondered when was the last time that he had a reality check. Anyhow, this man was sitting a few rows in front of me and couldn’t stop looking back continuously at me. It was disgusting. I was not the only one who thought that there was something wrong with this man as a couple sitting across the aisle from me had noticed the same. The lady looked at me and said to me, “What is that man’s problem?” All I said was, “The fool is drunk out of his mind.

I pointed the same to one of the crew members and told them to stop serving them alcohol as the situation could get out of control. They agreed with me as he and his friends were flatly refused when the next time they asked for a drink. Well, the meal was over and I was certain this man’s neck would be crying out of pain tomorrow.  The thought made me smile to myself.

With my tranquility destroyed, I couldn’t take another second of this nincompoop staring at me, so I moved to the middle seats and went into a slumber.

But my amazing readers, the story has not ended. As normal practice in Karachi, there is always security standing right outside the aircraft doors. As soon as I exited the aircraft, I informed the officials regarding the drunkard fellow. I even pointed him out to the officers. I did the same after clearing immigration and as they say, revenge is sweet. Custom officers saw him swaying right to left and three of them approached him with calm and directed him towards a private room. This was the end of the man with a neck sprain. *LOL*

Do we have the right to break the law for religion or any other reason we deem suitable?

I was traveling to London with a short transit in one of the middle eastern countries. The aircraft got cleaned, while the transit passengers were requested to remain on board.

The transit was short and cleaners were in and out. Thereafter, they started boarding the aircraft. I didn’t know that the boarding passengers would mostly be travelers who had performed Umrah. Umrah is one of Islam’s pilgrimages. By performing it, the person cleanses himself of his previous sins. You must be wondering how I know where these passengers were coming from. The white color garment that they were wearing symbolized that they were returning from their pilgrimage. This garment consists of two seamless sheets wrapped around their torso and legs.

As they were boarding I saw that the majority of them were carrying items wrapped loosely in plastic bags. Each person seemed to have at least two of these carelessly packed plastic bags and some were also carrying pails in their hands. Weird item to be traveling with but then again, who am I to judge.

It seemed like all of them knew each other. Strange isn’t it! Anyhow, it also felt like the aircraft belonged to them as they kept swapping seats with one another. I could see the crew getting a little irritated, but the situation was really out of their control. Also, as long as no one complained, the crew couldn’t be bothered by what was happening in front of them.

Finally, after some seating commotion, we were in the air. I thought this was the right time to take a short nap. Suddenly, the ‘call for prayer’ jolted me back to reality”. Muslims have this call for prayer called, “aazan.” “Ulama” in mosques all around the world make this call five times a day. In all my travel years, I had never witnessed a scene such as this. Few of the men immediately responded by rolling out their prayer mat, standing in the aisle, and started their “namaz,” their prayer. It was beautiful, the coordination with which they performed their prayer.

However, I thought that this was not necessary. Other Muslim travelers also perform their prayers while in the aircraft, but they do it seated. I have been informed by my Muslim friends that, it is the intention with which you pray that matters, and not where or in what position you pray. Furthermore, due to a few passengers blocking the aisle, it caused inconvenience for the crew, as they couldn’t move in the aisle and for passengers who couldn’t leave their seats.

Anyhow, it didn’t last long, before they were again back to their seats. However, I still wonder if it is right to break the law for religion or other reasons suitable to only one or a few individuals.

Why do some travelers shuffle seats or want to jump off the aircraft as soon as it touches the ground?

I have traveled both economy and business class. However, in economy class, the most annoying two actions that I have seen are, when a passenger takes someone else’s seat without asking them first. He then pretends to not speak the language or act like, he does not know the crime that he has committed. His action not only causes inconvenience to the person whose seat he has taken, but it also slows down the boarding process.

The other displeasing act is, the minute the aircraft lands, the people in economy class are ready to jump off the plane. Many times, I have seen the crew members scream at passengers, telling them to sit down as the aircraft has not come to a standstill. I would die of embarrassment if someone screamed at me for my ignorant action. Oh! But not the culprits. They are not bothered by the insults and they continue to do the same. What a shame!

Incest behavior on an aircraft.

I never thought that I would witness this ever. But like they say, “never say, never.”

This story goes years back. It is when airlines had banned smoking. The law was fairly new and some desperate ones thought that they could break the law and get away with it.

A family of four boarded the aircraft in front of me, parents, and their two teenage children, son, and daughter. Nothing out of the ordinary: they seemed like a normal family.

I noticed that the flight was quite empty. My seat was in the last section of the aircraft and luckily most of the back rows were empty. After having a light meal, I stretched out in my row of three seats. Watching a useless movie and waiting for sleep to take over my senses. It is then that I saw the two siblings I had seen before. They were laughing quietly and walking with their blankets towards the end of the aircraft. Both of them decided to take two rows behind me. Till now there was nothing out of the ordinary.

It was a night flight and my tired body and mind were asking for rest. I was going into my la-la land while ignoring the giggles and sounds coming from their direction. Suddenly, my senses came to an alert as I smelled nicotine. When I turned around, both freaks had blankets on top of themselves, and underneath they were creating a huff and a puff.

Right at that moment, the boy peeked out and saw me glaring at them. He knew that I knew what they were up to. At the same time, I had pressed the crew call button. Within a minute, a stewardess came over to me.

To my amazement, their behavior was nonchalant. However, guessing my action, they had quickly extinguished their cigarette and sprayed the area with scent. However, their giggles and the smell lingered in the atmosphere. The stewardess inquired if they were smoking, which of course they denied. Needless to say that, before she left, she sternly warned them regarding, no smoking policy in the aircraft and the penalty for it.

The freak siblings didn’t light again, but their other actions were worse than the first. Under the blanket, they started groping and kissing each other. All I could say to myself was, “sickening behavior.”

I put my headphones on and blasted the volume to block out their sounds. Maybe, I should have called their parents over, but then I thought, who am I to interfere in these people’s bizarre life.

The Mile High Club.

My list would not be complete without The Mile High Club on it. The slang became so popular (needless to say, why) that, there is a website now, and once you become a member then, you can share your stories on it 

I shall not write a specific anecdote for this portion as I would like to request you, my reader, to contribute your story. All you travelers, at one time or another, must have seen something that you probably wanted or did not want to see. Also, your personal story is more than welcome.

Email me your humorous anecdote and I promise to create a separate article once I have received at least five tales and I shall dedicate it to my Anonymous Amazing Readers.